After a brief two-game break, the Georgetown Hoyas’ 2016-17 Existential Misery Tour continued Monday night, as the Hoyas suffered a crushing 74-56 loss at home to Providence. Do you really want to know how bad this game was? It was so bad that the ball ran away screaming. In the first half, a loose ball legitimately ran away, rolling off the court, right underneath the spot where I was standing, through the gap in the risers, and all the way back into the tunnel.
@Hoya_Saxual Lost it. Went under my feet, Buckner style— Roey (@roeyhadar) January 17, 2017
The ball went all the way under the risers. I squatted underneath in case it popped back out in the hopes of simulating a b-ball birth https://t.co/sD6BBZkpBH— Roey (@roeyhadar) January 17, 2017
Contrary to what was posited on the game thread, no, I did not steal the ball, but yes, it probably would have helped if I did.
How bad was this game? Jack the Bulldog didn’t even want to go on his skateboard. He went about two feet, hopped off, and refused to get back on.
Jack the Bulldog did NOT want to ride his skateboard— FS1 (@FS1) January 17, 2017
He's still a good dog though, @GeorgetownHoops. #BIGEAST https://t.co/CVwF5rK0hF
How bad was this game? I got a message from a friend of mine that said “I would have rather read John Rawls tonight than sit through that mess.” Not only does that quote perfectly embody several Georgetown stereotypes, but it also means that someone legitimately wanted to read an incredibly dense political philosophy text on notions of justice instead of watching this. Another text from a friend from home who watches a lot of Hoyas basketball simply said, “this should be JT3’s last game.”
How bad was this game? I made a new friend on Saturday at the UConn game, one who wasn’t really into basketball but who really enjoyed herself and was incredibly excited to come to Monday’s game. The smile never left her face between the time she arrived and tip-off. Within a few minutes, however, the look on her face resembled the kind only reserved for watching a puppy get run over. Her disposition did not change for the duration of the game. We can only hope that she and any other fans converted to Hoya fandom by their enjoyable UConn game experiences do not choose to run away and never come back.
How bad was this game? They chanted “Fire Thompson” again, but the chants were significantly more tepid than those in the Arkansas State game. Why, you may ask? Because most people had already left.
Now I hear you shouting at your computer “All right, I get it! It was bad!” But please, allow me one more. This game was so bad that I gave up. Before the game, I had meant to meet up with a friend and recent alum who was planning on coming to the game. Our plan was to grab a quick drink at the Greene Turtle bar inside the arena at the half and head back for the last 20 minutes. But with the Hoyas down fifteen at the half and with that deficit growing as the half went on, we decided to more or less ignore the game and just catch up while we finished our respective beers. I have to admit that it was significantly more enjoyable than it would have been to watch things just keep getting worse.
Here’s me at the end of the game, with the most appropriate “big head” possible (and by the way, the “Baby Jack” shirts, as you can tell, came out looking spectacular):
#mood #hoyas pic.twitter.com/B6gps8PIEY— Roey (@roeyhadar) January 17, 2017
As for the rest of the crowd, I didn’t get too much video because I was gone for most of the second half, but I caught some of the sarcastic late-game reactions. After Hoyas forward Akoy Agau nailed two free throws, the crowd decided to shower him with their adulation (and of course, I couldn’t avoid adding a bit of perspective at the end.)
Some sarcastic late-game cheering pic.twitter.com/teOKpD9RZX— Roey (@roeyhadar) January 17, 2017
After that, the few tortured souls remaining in the crowd celebrated “garbage time” the best way they knew how—by breaking out into a rendition of “Just a Friend” by Biz Markie.
When all hope is gone, why not sing some Biz Markie? pic.twitter.com/wTebc8eLaE— Roey (@roeyhadar) January 17, 2017
And during the rest of the game, the crowd still had some fun. In the first half, when significantly more people filled the student section, fans shouted and sang in efforts to distract Friars at the free throw line. An early effort directed at Friars guard Jalen Lindsay, where one fan clearly shouted “your beard is stupid,” led to a miss. My own heckling effort, where I joked that Friars forward Kalif Young did not live up to his name and looked like he was forty years old helped trigger back-to-back misses from the charity stripe. Unfortunately, the later efforts, which included a rendition of Kelly Clarkson’s “Since U Been Gone,” did not work as well.
The “Copy That Scene” cam also featured one of the few moments of joy for fans. The scene for Monday’s iteration was the “Blue Steel” scene from “Zoolander.” I had my moment in the sun, dramatically turning to the camera and pursing my lips, but the scene stealer had to be a young kid, no older than around ten years old, who seemed to also add some sort of vampire cape-style flourish to his imitation.
Wait, Roey, you know you’re also supposed to write about basketball, right?
Yeah, fine. Kudos to you for actually wanting to know what happened in this game. Providence thoroughly manhandled the Hoyas in a game that serves as perhaps the strongest testament yet to the growing disappointment, disillusionment, and apathy setting in among the Georgetown fan base. The Hoyas looked overmatched defensively as the Friars found high-percentage shots almost at will. Seemingly every possession featured either a shot attempt from close range or an open outside shot opportunity generated by a poor Hoyas defensive rotation.
Four Friars found their way into double figures and guard Kyron Cartwright finished one rebound shy of a triple-double with 16 points, 11 assists, and nine rebounds. Rodney Bullock led all players with 22 points.
On the offensive end, things looked similarly hopeless. The Hoyas shot just 33% from the floor, including a woeful 22% from behind the three-point line. Swingmen Rodney Pryor and LJ Peak finished the game as the only two Hoyas in double figures, with 13 and 12 points respectively (albeit on a combined 8-28 from the field.)
Despite a relatively lacking offensive performance wherein he scored only four points and failed to make a single field goal, Akoy Agau led the way for the Hoyas with eight rebounds, continuing to make his presence felt on the glass. If you want a fact to console yourself with as you cry yourself to sleep, Agau has actually averaged 6.8 rebounds per game in his last five contests despite averaging just 15.6 minutes per game over that span.
I have been to plenty of soul-crushing Georgetown losses. I saw the 2014 collapse vs. Marquette, which saw the Hoyas blow an eight point lead with 30 seconds left and is now forever known as the “Sad Scott” game. I saw the embarrassing double-OT loss to Radford last season, the time Monmouth beat us by fifteen at home, that game where Xavier just ran away with it early in the second half. Even Arkansas State did not compare to this, the most deflating Georgetown home game I have ever attended. None of those games featured both a wire-to-wire win for the opponent and no significant Georgetown comeback attempt. In other words, this game was a very special kind of “bad.”
Hoya Saxa! This is just getting sad.