Your Fighting Hoyas of Georgetown staved off certain NCAA Tournament death with a win over the Xavier Musketeers on Saturday and as usual we here at THE GLOBAL PHENOMENON are handing out hardware to those most deserving. Away we go!
The Chris Wright Heart of a Champion Award:
Markel Starks. Starks rebounded from a shitty (term of art) performance against Seton Hall with a solid showing against the Muskies, finishing with 20 point, 4 assists and a grad appearance with a casual headband, GIF courtest of HoyaMedicineMan:
Big Man U Award:
The much-maligned Georgetown frontcourt produced one of its best games of the season, with Nate Lubick, Mikael Hopkins and Moses Ayegba combining for 21 points, 10 rebounds and 5 blocks. It used to be that the Hoyas would have one guy who could put up these numbers, but whatever, positive steps as we'll need this triumvirate to show up in every game moving forward.
John Wooden Award:
John Thompson III. Inserting Jabril Trawick into the starting lineup instead of Reggie Cameron was a masterstroke. Will this be the spark the Hoyas need in the final kick of the regular season? Fuck if I know.
Saturday Was Glorious Award:
The Hoyas won and Jim Boeheim made an ass of himself.
Below are some of the best of the Boeheim internet memes, swiped lovingly from Nunes Magician:
Who Cares How Fast a Football Player Can Run 40 Yards in a Straight Line Award:
That never happens in a game, like ever, unless it's a position player breaking away for a TD. Nonetheless, I thought this GIF was cool comparing Clowney and that speedy Oregon RB:
I Will Now Rank The Following Cheeses Award:
If I'm at your place and eating cheese and crackers, these are the cheeses I want, in order:
1) Smoked Gouda, 2) Manchego, 3) Camembert, 4) Gorgonzola. You also need to have a nice selection of cured meats to go along with same, and perhaps a spreadable chutney jam as well.
What Happens to Reggie Cameron Now Award:
Not sure if Reggie will be able to crack the rotation again unless one of the others gets into foul trouble. I hope that tis demotion doesn't hurt his confidence as I think he can be a valuable player for the Hoyas next season and beyond in his true role as a spot-up shooter.
Bradley Hayes For The Win Award:
Hayes' majestic basket off the glass in the waning moments was the 1st basket he has ever made at the Verizon Center. Probably his last, but whatever.
Fox Sports 1 Can Eat a Bag of All The Dicks Award:
We've given FS1 a long leash given that it's been the 1st year of college hoops coverage and even though its announcers can't pronounce half the players' names, it's pretty cool that the Big East has its own network BUT... shifting the Hoyas-Xavier game to FS2 (a channel that not everyone has) in order to show the rain-delayed PRACTICE LAPS for Daytona was really a slap in the face to Hoyas and Xavier fans.
Dickie V Award:
Speaking of not being able to pronounce player names, big ups to FS1's Stu Jackson for rolling out the previously unheard "Jabril Trotwig". Like many times. Jackson's counterpart Justin Kutcher continues to be a bright spot, however.
Document Your Lunch Award:
These snowcrab and pork spring rolls from a delightful little place called Rolls & Bowls were off the charts.
Good Riddance Award:
Winter Olympics. Was it just me or were these Olympics a massive snoozefest? I don't know what happened to the Winter Olympics, but I remember as a kid really being into the luge and bobsled stuff and now everything seems to have devolved into something having to do with a halfpipe. The rise of the stoner-athlete has ruined America.
The Alley-Oop Missed 'Round the World:
Starks to Bowen was real pretty, and you missed it if you didn't have Fox Sports 2. GIF courtesy of HoyaSaxual:
The Jim Nantz Award for In-Game Commentary:
Is there a Fox Sports 2?
Kate Upton Award for Kate Upton Doing Kate Upton Things:
Hope Survives Award:
With the win over Xavier the Hoyas notched another win against a team with a solid NCAA Tournament resume and now have a chance to earn its way into the Dance with remaining games against Marquette, Creighton and Villanova. After a rollercoaster season that has had more downs than ups, this is really all we can ask for. Hope survives, for now. Actually, it will still probably survive even with a loss to Marquette if Georgetown can beat Creighton AND Villanova, but we'll cross that bridge if we need to. I don't want to cross that fucking bridge. Win Thursday, dammit.
The Georgetown Hoyas are not quite yet a nationally ranked powerhouse.
Marquette is NeXt.