Your Fighting Hoyas of Georgetown got crushed by the Kansas Jayhawks but that hasn't doused our Christmas spirit! As usual we here at THE GLOBAL PHENOMENON are putting on our Santa hats and handing out hardware to those most deserving. Away we go!
The Chris Wright Heart of a Champion Award:
Bradley Hayes. Yeah I could have given this to Markel Starks for leading the Hoyas in scoring and playing his heart out until the final buzzer, but when the hell else am I ever going to get a chance to give a prized TCWHOACA to Bradley Hayes? Hayes scored his first bucket as a Hoyas against Kansas and for that he is a most deserving winner of the TCWHOACA. Congrats, Bradley!
Office Pool Loss Award:
Anyone else have "Kansas" has the game on our schedule that Bradley Hayes would score his first basket?
Big Man U Award:
Kansas. Man, it must be nice to have a frontcourt like Kansas does. Two lottery picks in Joel Embiid and Andrew Wiggins, a likely NBA guy in Perry Ellis plus a backup big like Tarik Black off the bench? Kind of makes our Smith-Lubick-Hopkins-Moses frontline look like ass.
Coolest App You Don't Know About Award:
Venmo. So it's like PayPal but way more casual. You can text charges and things to your buddies and it's linked to your checking account and stuff. I just found out about this and I've already sent 'bills' to most of my friends. If you are reading this and haven't received any texts from me, it is because you are not my friend. You win.
Dickie V Award:
I like Jay BIlas and he brings a lot to the table compared to most of the other gimpburgers that ESPN has, but I found myself hoping that he'd just stop talking all the time. Seems like Bilas is using these games as a soapbox to opine on everything from NCAA policy to the officiating and I kind of just wish he'd go back to doing what he does best and calling the game on the floor.
Highlight of the Decade Fail Award:
Aaron Bowen. Oh how I wanted that two-handed dunk in Joel Embiid's face to go down. Oh how Embiid turned that attempt into his own personal highlight and ruined everything.
You'll Shoot Your Eye Out Award:
Stephen Domingo. At some point his shots have to start going in, right? RIGHT? RIGHT?
Christmas Dinner Award:
Much like Thanksgiving, if you're having turkey on Christmas you might as well shoot yourself in the eye. EAT HAM. HAM FOR THE WIN. HAM ALL DAY.
The Rocky Balboa Award:
Is the Jabril Trawick schtick wearing off? Love that "Philly toughness" and all but it's becoming a bit of a liability. Case in point: After picking up two quick fouls in the first 5 minutes of the game (again), the Hoyas were struggling but down just 8 with 16 minutes to go and Jabril decided to elbow Andrew Wiggins who had been sleepwalking through the game to that point. Wiggins drills a three, Hoyas never within double digits the rest of the way. Ba humbug.
Fantasy Football Award:
Jamaal Charles! Wow! Merry Christmas to you and your family. On the same token, on behalf of all the owners whose dreams were dashed because Aaron Rodgers couldn't get back on the field after 8 fucking weeks after hurting his collarbone and then watched Tony Romo toss 2 TDs against the Redskins with a herniated disc, eat a dick Aaron Rodgers. #NeverForget.
Toying with Emotions Award:
Georgetown Hoyas. For the first ten minutes of this game I was watching and thinking, 'hey, maybe these guys are pretty good!' Tweets about how good the Hoyas were playing started to flood my timeline and I had visions of AP Top 25 votes appearing on Monday. Then the rest of the game happened. I'm still not sure if the Hoyas of the first ten minutes is a team we will get to see for 40 minutes in any game this season, but if that happens I think Georgetown can be pretty good.
Tweet of the Week Award:
Tweet of the Week II Award:
Tweet of the Week III Award:
Hoyatalk or @CasualHoya comments? What will provide me with the best dark humor? Time to find out.— Bobby Bancroft (@BobbyBancroft) December 21, 2013
Christmas Movie Rankings Award:
1) A Christmas Story
3) National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
Wilt Chamberlain Award:
Tarik Black. Tarik Black had 17 points, 6 rebounds and 2 blocks off the bench against Georgetown. I started to write more about this performance but it made me very angry and now I'm pissed. Here comes the documentation....
Document Your Kansas Experience Award:
There were a number of folks to sent in documentation from the trip to Allen Fieldhouse for the game, and in particular I'd like to give a big casual shout out to @OffAirOnPoint and @dcfooter for sending in the majority of the below:
The Jim Nantz Award for In-Game Commentary: