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Sleeping with the Enemy: The Phoenix of Elon

Hooray! New content!  Your Fighting Hoyas of Georgetown emerge from finals break to clash with the Elon Phoenix of the Southern Conference and here to bring you everything you need to know about Elon are our friends at Mid-Major Madness, who have pretty much supported THE GLOBAL PHENOMENON by providing casual content through the drudgery of our non-conference schedule.  Away we go.

The Elon Phoenix! I have to say, that's a real casual nickname and one that I wasn't expecting from a team located in North Carolina. Are you as high (not on drugs) on the nickname and awesome logo as I am?

I'm guessing that drugs may be involved. Elon used to be the Fighting Christians, but then changed to the Phoenix. It was a sad move because they had an awesome logo and of course a vicious mascot. Now their mascot resembles Baby Sinclair from Dinosaurs (why was that show ever cancelled?).

(Casual Note: The series 'Dinosaurs' was truly ahead of its time. I think the Jurassic Park phenomenon actually helped kill it, as that movie's version of the extinct reptiles (OR ARE THEY BIRDS!) made the 'Dinosaurs' renditions look like low-budget porn.  Not that I watch low-budget porn, of course.  Moving on.)

Who are some of the guys on the Phoenix that Georgetown needs to be aware of?

Elon is a very balanced team when it comes to scoring and they essentially have five guys averaging in double-figures. Lucas Troutman was picked by many to be the Southern Conference Player of the Year, so he's the guy to watch. He's averaging over 17 points per game and nearly 5 rebounds. He's also shooting 100% from three this season (1 for 1)! Ryley Beaumont is also a pretty good player and he's averaging 10.9 points and 5 boards per outing. I think those are the two guys who have chance at giving Georgetown a little bit of trouble.

Where do you see Elon finishing in the Southern Conference this season? Who gets the auto-bid to the Dance?

I actually picked Elon in our Mid-Major Madness preview to win the conference and take the auto-bid. Simply put, the SoCon has been craptastic this year and no one really wants to step up. Elon had a chance to make some noise and maybe climb into our Mid-Major Top 15 poll, but they just haven't won the games to do that. The Preseason NIT was their low point losing three out of four games, including at home to Division II power Metro State. Since then Elon has rattled off three straight wins, but those wins have been closer then they should be.

This will be a two horse race between them and Davidson. Davidson has been just as woeful with a 4-6 mark this season.

Princeton Review and Campus Compact chose Elon as one of 81 "colleges with a conscience" in the United States. What the fuck does this mean, exactly?

You obviously don't have a conscience.

Elon is moving to the Colonial Athletic Conference next year. Thoughts on the step-up in competition?

I think it may depend on how much momentum Elon can capture this year regarding how well they can springboard into the CAA. All in all this is a program that has two winning years in their 16 history at the Division I level, it might be a rough transition. I kind of picture them as the new William & Mary of the CAA. A scrappy team of smarty pants that may be hovering around .500 every year and will make some noise once and awhile.

Below is Elon's Fight Song:

'So here's to dear old Elon
Faithful and bold
Here's to her banner
Of maroon and gold
Here's to men and women
Who've come and gone
Singing the victor's song
Of old Elon'

I'm thinking this song is a tad bland, you?

Yea it really doesn't get me going, perhaps they switched it around when they got rid of that fighting Amish guy I mentioned earlier.

Apparently there is a student-run organization at Elon that celebrates Festivus, based on that Seinfeld episode. What are your thoughts on Seinfeld and please relay your top 3 favorite episodes.

I would kind of think this is blasphemous on campus. I'm not really much of a Seinfield guy, but if you need some analysis on Family Matters or Fresh Prince of Bel Air then you know where to find me.

(Casual Note: I'm a bit surprised that Reginald Vel Johnson, the portly happy father in Family Matters, didn't have a better career after that show ended.  Other than a cameo role as a police officer in one of the Die Hard films (I think that one at Dulles airport), I don't recall seeing him anywhere else)

Rank the following in order of preference with tortilla chips: Pico de gallo, guacemole, salsa

Salsa is number one without a doubt. Then you can't deny the powers of the super fruit avocado. Isn't Pico de Gallo just watered down salsa chunks?

(Casual Note: Hate to keep interjecting here, but pico can be wonderful if done correctly. The freshness of the diced tomatoes, onions and cilantro is often a better option than salsa.  If not properly prepared, however, it can indeed be a watery mess.)

Final score prediction?

81-63 Hoyas, I don't think it should be too much a problem in the Phone Booth.