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The Casual Awards: Why-oh, Why-oh, Why-oh, Did We Have To Lose To Ohio?


The Chris Wright Heart of a Champion Award:
Chris Wright. Do we even have to say it? 28 points. Once again, from minute one, he picked up the team and carried it as far as he could. It wasn't far enough. All of our complaints about Wright earlier in the season? Even though we have already forgiven them, WE FORGIVE THEM AGAIN. Chris Wright is the best. THE BEST, JERRY. THE BEST.  I am going to finish this bottle of Australian wine and then start in on this six-pack of Peroni and hope that I dream about Chris Wright when I sleep. Because otherwise I will sleepwalk in front of a bus. 

The There is Nothing That Can Be Worse Than The Davidson Loss, Right? Award:
The Loss to Ohio. OHIO? What the f-ck is Ohio? Let's catalog the worst losses ever. To Nova in '85: that was all cocaine. To Davidson in '08: that was against one of the greatest shooters in a generation. To Ohio: ummmm... Davidson was at least THE SECOND ROUND. This was the first loss by a three-seed in the tournament in FOUR YEARS. Hey Hoyas: Put that feather in your caps and sit on it until the Kenner league games start. At least then we can watch Monroe in his summer workouts for the Grizzlies.

More Awards after The Jump:

The Laughing Makes The Hurt Go Away Award:
30 Rock. Thank the Good Lord Baby Jesus that following that CBS debacle was one of the better episodes of "30 Rock" on NBC. It's important to learn to laugh again. To learn to love again. To realize that tomorrow is another day.

"I'm going to bury Don Geist, America and The Hoyas."  via

The Playing With Fire Only Gets you Burned Award: Are you kidding me? The day before our return to the tournament after a one-year absence, for a game against Ohio, we live-blog a recording of a LOSS to Ohio State? Is this a joke? Are we insane? Clearly, we made a HUGE MISTAKE.  On the flip-side: If you have any friends who are involved in illegal sports gambling, call them right now and bet your mortgage on Ohio State. Because they are about to win the whole goddamn thing because of our folly.

The Price Goeth Before The Fall Award:
Do you know what the Westin St. Louis is charging for a standard room next Thursday night? $232. Not too bad for a classy hotel. But why would I know that? WHY WOULD I KNOW THAT? Because I went online and checked hotel rooms in St. Louis this afternoon while I was thinking not only past the Ohio game, but beyond the Tennessee game. Do you want to know the last hotel room I looked up on the internet? The Westin Detroit.


Follow me to Detroit!  via

The Award For Not Making Up An Award Because It Might Be Insensitive to Diabetics:
[this space intentionally left blank]

Lord of the Flies Award:
So this is what happens when you throw together a team with no leadership? As we've noted countless times, Wright fancies himself a leader but there is no one following him. He absolutely plays to win and competes but there wasn't a time in yesterday's game (or this season) where it appeared that the team was rallying behind him. Monroe has stunning talent but almost always lacks the passion to compete - it'll be easy for him and the team to shake off what we say here because none of us played ball, etc. but every one of us desk jockeys would trade places with him in a heartbeat and the only thing we ever ask for is consistent effort. Lastly, Austin Freeman - again, a wealth of talent but a quiet guy who is not able to lead the team.

The One Night I would Possibly Beat My Wife/Girlfriend/Husband/Boyfriend/Child/Dog to Death In a Fit of Rage Award:
I do not want to talk about it. I DO NOT WANT TO TALK ABOUT. I never touched anyone. I went in the other room and closed the door. I went outside and walked around the block. I DID NOT LAY A HAND UPON MY WIFE/GIRLFRIEND/HUSBAND/BOYFRIEND/CHILD/DOG. AND YOU CANNOT PROVE ANYTHING. Yeah, I had a few drinks. But I kept everything under control. I didn't hear anybody call the cops. So just chill out man. I am fine. Fine. Get off my case.

What Might Have Been Award:
Anyone notice that Macklin went for 16 and 7 against BYU? Sure, Florida stunk up the gym and let all-name pg Jimmer Fredette light them up but it damn sure would have been nice to have Macklin next to Monroe yesterday.

The Award for Puppy Who Loves Me Even Though I Blog About A National Embarrassment:

Don't worry guys.  There's always next year!  I enjoy chewing on rawhide.

All Pundits are Morons Award:
Remember all that talk about the Big East and how great it was and how many teams it would get to the Final Four and how grueling the season was? You know, so grueling that the EIGHTH PLACE FINISHER was considered the best three seed in the tournament? Well, after Notre Dame, Georgetown, and Marquette laid eggs and Villanova narrowly escaped the mighty Robert Morris, I think it might be a good time to reassess.  I'm sure we're all really excited for Notre Dame to join the Big Ten, and watch the carnage as the Big East becomes a FCS conference of Catholic schools. The Big East's day in the sun is over.

Camp Crystal Lake Award:
Providence, Rhode Island. In 1989, #1 seeded Georgetown won 50-49 over #16 Princeton in the closest 1-16 matchup ever. We hadn't gone back to Providence since. UNTIL YESTERDAY. Let's just say next time we have a first round game in Providence, I am laying heavy money on the other team.

Jeremiah Rivers Award:
Jason Clark. Two years ago, it was vaunted defensive stopper Rivers who got torched by Stephen Curry. This year it was ol JCDeuceUno. Dude, have you ever defended a crossover before?

Mark McGwire Award for Someone Should Test This Guy:
Armon Bassett. 25 years ago, the Villanova Wildcats used cocaine to defeat Georgetown for the national championship. Yesterday, Bassett, a man who was kicked off Indiana for failing numerous drug tests, scored 32 points. Coincidence? I think not.

Bernie From Weekend at Bernie's ward:
John Thompson III. Maybe a little bit of yelling would have been helpful yesterday. I'm not even sure JT3 knew there was a game going on. He looked like he was as little invested as the players were. It starts at the top, and the man needs to show some sort of a pulse when his team is getting its asses handed to them by Ohio. Ohio went 7-9 in the MAC this year, if you didn't know.

#Anti Swag Life Award:
If I had a Twitter, that's what I'd call the Georgetown team. You have no swag when you lose to Ohio in the first round of the NCAA Tournament. You have no swag when you lose to Rutgers and South Florida. This team only played well when it was the underdog or had something to prove. Any time it got positive publicity, it went back to cocky, arrogant and worthless. Swag on that.

One Bright Spot Award:
Hollis Thompson. Hollis really came on in the last few games of the season. He had 16 points last night, and should have played a lot more than Jerrelle Benimon. Definitely feel good thinking about his development into next year. It will be interesting to see if he can start the year weighing more than 150 pounds too.

The Take A Deep Breath And Maybe Stay Away from Sharp Objects Award:
All of us. I was doing the dishes from last night when I awoke this morning and lo and behold there was a little bit food in the bottom of the sink so I just flipped the switch to turn on the old insinkerator to clean that mess up and as I watched the food and water disappear beneath the protective rubber flaps I wondered what it would be like to put my hand in there. Just jam it right down into the rotating blades. What would that feel like? Would that make me forget? Would that erase the memory of last night? Of all the nights? Yes! There! In the sink! My escape! Just a little bit closer... a little bit closer. I can hear the grinding sounds of sweet release, the warm water bathing my fingers. Everything is going to be fi--HOLD ON A GOD DAMN MINUTE! JESUS CHRIST THAT IS A GARBAGE DISPOSAL. Whoa. Deep breath. Deep breath. I need to sit down. This is not cool.


The Casual Award:
To the readers of  Whether you've been with us from the beginning or this is your first time stopping by, we truly appreciate all of your contributions and comments to the THE GLOBAL PHENOMENON.  This is a sad day no doubt, but our hearts will go on.  We will continue the game threads throughout the tournament and afterwards we will figure out what to do over the offseason.  Don't worry, we will still be around to give you your required dose of cynicism and delusion.           

The Georgetown Hoyas were a nationally ranked powerhouse.

Midnight Madness is NeXt.