Sex, Lies, and Audiotapes! Welcome to Louisville!

So while this blog and its readers have been sitting in McDonough apparently waiting for the second coming of Kenny Izzo, what's been going on in the world?

Glad you asked.

It seems like the extortion trial of Karen Sypher has begun in Louisville. Sypher... Sypher... where have you heard that name before? Oh right, she's the gal who WAS NAILED BY RICK PITINO ON A RESTAURANT TABLE AFTER HOURS a few years ago beginning a sordid tale of love, lust, uh, abortion, extortion and a whole new meaning to the phrase TABLE FOR TWO.

This is apparently something we should be paying attention to. Naughty bits after the jump (the baby with the casual headband should not continue reading, by the way):

The folks over at kentuckysportsradio.com have the full run down of this week's opening arguments but because you are surely running out of Double Stuff Oreos or your basement is flooded from recent storms, here are a few important points to note before you run to the store or drown in storm-water runoff.

First, from the representatives of YOUR United States government:

- On July 31, 2003, Rick Pitino and Karen Sypher have sex in Porcini's after meeting for the first time in the restaurant.
- Pitino Assistant Vinnie Tatum was present for the entire encounter
- Soon thereafter, Sypher realizes she is pregnant and on August 21, signs a paper at a Women's Clinic saying she wants to have an abortion.
- On August 29, Tim Sypher takes Karen Sypher to Cincinnati where she has an abortion. The two later become close and end up getting married.

Six years pass, Karen and Tim attend social events with Pitino, Karen blows her attorney and-- WHAT?

- March 22, 2009, Sypher has oral sex with her lawyer Dana Kolter and he agrees to help her with her situation. Rick Pitino also gives $10,000 to Tim Sypher for Karen out of his bonus he was given for winning the Big East Tournament. The money is to buy Karen's son a car.
- March 24, 2009, Kolter writes Rick a letter demanding money in satisfaction for potential claims Sypher may have against him.
- March 31, 2009, Pitino's lawyers and Kolter meet...$3.5 million is demanded and the meeting ends with no agreement.
- April 7, 2009, Pitino reports Sypher's threats to the Kentucky Attorney General.

Yes, that is a hat and sunglasses on the statue in the background. via media.al.com

Thus. The trial. What's Sypher's response? She says she was raped by Pitino at Porcini's after the owner tossed him the keys and said "lock up when you are done." She says Pitino demanded a ride home after the rape, so she drove him home. She later meets with Pitino at his house where he again rapes her. Pitino later considers offering money to make the problem go away. Syper (and the attorney the government claims she performed oral sex upon) ask for about $500k. NO DEAL.

We are just getting started. http://kentuckysportsradio.com/ may quickly become my favorite blog.