Not even Georgetown's first loss of the season would prevent us from handing out the hardware to the most deserving. Ladies, gentlemen and trolls from ODU - the Casual Awards.
This award goes out to something that is vastly overrated. Sure guacamole is a decent chip dip, but it is certainly not worthy of taking the place of ketchup as a burger dressing or an extra $2.00 at Chipotle. Guacamole represents how hype and the affection of high school girls can overshadow the obvious flaws of such a bland and terribly textured condiment. How can something be described as both smooth and chunky? It doesn't make sense. Congrats to the Georgetown Hoyas, this year's first winner of the infamous award. After an 8-0 start and #11 ranking, Georgetown took 35 minutes to realize they were playing a game and not practicing in their home gymnasium.
"I Was In Elementary School When Esherick Was Coach" Award:
The 2,000+ students that braved the 2-3 minute walk from their dorm room in knee-high snow to watch their beloved Hoyas disappoint. We here at Casual Hoya often whine, complain and curse the students for their apathy towards the program, and belittle them for failing to support a program that six seasons failed to make the NIT. We say that they have been spoiled by Georgetown's recent success and don't remember what it was like to watch the team fail over and over again. You proved us wrong students, and NO ONE has ever proved us wrong, NO ONE.
IronMan Triathlon Award:
Goes out to very own OldHoya for walking from his home, to his office, to Martin's, to the game and
then back home during Washington's worst blizzard in eighty years. Solid showing by the crafty veteran fan.
Greg Monroe. Seriously, dominating against Butler and UW and then dropping 15 against ODU in a loss? I'm thrilled he can shoot threes but wouldn't we rather have our star big man getting three layups over the course of the game rather than hoping he hits a three to close the gap in the last minute?
Steve Phillips Award for Excellence in Broadcasting Award:
MASN. Come on - losing the signal three times in the second half?
Most Demoralizing Fans of the Game Award:
The two GUYS who dressed up as Cookie Monster and Big Bird. We're all for getting on TV but let's be sure to salvage some dignity.
Nikita Award for Horrific Play of the Game Award:
Chris Wright. In a play completely emblematic of this pathetic game, Wright seals the deal by throwing a pass out of bounds at the end of the game. Completely clueless as a point guard.
Billy Ray Valentine-Louis Winthorpe III Award:
Julian Vaughn and Henry Sims. Vaughn embracing the fact that he is a big man has been an unexpected and refreshing breath of fresh air - we expected little if anything from him this season and he has made incredible strides. Henry on the other hand, has gone from potential riches to rags and his body language as he steps to the court is nothing short of sad. Not sure what it will take for him to regain some confidence but this is quickly shaping up to be a season in purgatory
'It's a Small World' Award:
LordNick's multiple trips on Disneyland's most famous ride never let him know that there were black guys in Finland. Instead, it took Old Dominion's starting center, Gerald Lee to expand his horizons.
The Austin Powers "I Also Like to Live Dangerously" Award:
Georgetown University for declaring the game will go on after Mayor Fenty pleads with citizens not to leave their homes during the blizzard.
The Chicago Bears Award for Reading Weather Reports:
ODU for coming in early and being ready to play at the appointed time, unlike the Bears who got to Baltimore late only to get CREAMED in a weather-delayed beat down.
Always Look on the Bright Side Award:
Jeremiah Rivers continued his hot streak with a 5 turnover outing against NC Central and on the same night, Vernon Macklin laid an egg with 4 points in a home loss to Richmond. Petty and vindictive, yes but come on, we just lost to Old Dominion
Black Saturday Award:
To our very own blogger, casualhoya, whose Hoyas and Saints both suffered losses on Saturday at the same time. Not even a casual Superdome bloody mary and the celeb sighting of Miami Social's Katrina Campins could wash the taste of bitter defeat from his mouth, though the Campins sighting helped out a lot. Like, really a lot.
The Jerome Harrison What The F*ck Was That Award:
Given in honor of the fantasy player whose breakout performance came out of nowhere, this week's award goes to the various Old Dominion Monarch fans who decided to check out Casualhoya.com and brag about their program after the win. Congrats, guys. Really a great win. Best of luck against Northeastern.
Harvard is NeXt.